Fox News Anchor Jesse Watters In Hot Water For Suggesting Ivanka Trump Holds A Microphone Like A Dick

Death and Taxes – After reshuffling the Fox News lineup in the wake of Bill O’Reilly’s firing, “The Factor” correspondent and sentient red Solo cup Jesse Watters ended up cohosting the panel show “The Five.” During Wednesday’s broadcast the panel discussed Ivanka Trump getting booed at the W20 Summit in Berlin. Watters saw this as an opportunity to make a blowjob joke.

“It’s funny the left says they really respect women and then when given the opportunity to respect a woman they boo and hiss,” Watters said. “I don’t really get what’s going on here, but, uh, I really liked how she was speaking into that microphone.”

Notice how Watters punctuates that observation by making a gripping motion with his hand.

Everybody knows I’m a huge excuse guy.  Need to see the Watters excuse.  Lay it on me brother.  Tell me what you really meant.

Voice resonates like a smooth jazz DJ!!

Oh my God it’s even better than I anticipated.  That’s an F- excuse and I love it.  And to be clear I obviously don’t have a problem with the comment.  I’m not offended by casual blowjob jokes.  I love Ivanka with all my heart and I want to fight all these people booing her but to be honest she is holding that microphone very sensually.

The only thing that offends me is when people try to piss on my head and tell me it’s raining and that’s exactly what Jesse Watters is doing here.  Come on dude.  You went to Chinatown and made fun of people for not being able to speak English.   And this is the one you try to backtrack on?

Gripping that mic like a big old dick.   I know it, you know it.

PS,

I was so close to going with “In Hot Watters” in my headline, so close, but I feel like I’m not quite at Dad Joke age yet.