Hockey Tough 101: Should Wayne Gretzky Distance Himself From Dustin Johnson If His Stair Fall Keeps Him Out Of The Masters?
Dustin Johnson fell down some stairs and injured his back yesterday. Trent blogged the story live from Augusta and you can read that here. Anyways, Dustin Johnson says he “hopes” that he can play today and tees off at 2:03. Now obviously this sucks for DJ and it sucks for golf to have one of the best players in the game have to go through the first major tournament with a bizarro injury. However, it sucks for Wayne Gretzky the most because this is where he finally finds out if his baby girl made the right decision or not by marrying him. Because if Dustin Johnson has an ounce of Hockey Guy in his blood, he’ll play today and he’ll play tomorrow and he’ll play Saturday and he’ll finish his round on Sunday with the lowest score and a Green jacket. Why? Because hockey guys aren’t going to let some silly little injury keep them on the sidelines. Hockey guys aren’t going to let a broken back stop them from playing the game they love. A back injury? That’s a helluva long way from the heart, DJ.
Now I’ll be honest. I’m already a little worried here because a true hockey guy wouldn’t disclose the injury before the tournament started. At the very most, they’d just say that Dustin Johnson has an upper-body injury and will be a game time decision. You can’t let your opponents know specifically what’s ailing you unless you want them to know your weakness. Old hockey trick to keep that sort of shit under wraps. But if I’m Wayne Gretzky right now, I’m letting Dustin Johnson know that my honor is on the line here. You can’t be the greatest hockey player in the history of the world and then let your son-in-law miss one of the biggest tournaments of the year just because he hurt his wittle back falling down a flight of stairs. Mainline some ibuprofen and get your ass out on the course. You’ve got plenty of time to rest your back when you’re dead.