Highlights From Cow Chase 2017 And RIP To A True Legend

Jamaica, Queens. Home of the Johnnies, 50 Cent, and the cow/bull that captivated the internet for a few minutes on a random Tuesday in February. In case you weren’t on Twitter for the 5 minutes that this was going down, boy oh boy did you miss a show. Not nearly on the same level as the Great Llama Chase of 2015, but a bull escaping a slaughterhouse and taking the cops for a ride is going to be a pretty wild scene in its own. Just watch this majestic creature go.

First off, this has been my favorite Chick-Fil-A ad in quite some time. Glad to see they’re stepping up the viral game. Second off, how about that jackass thinking he could keep up with the bull on foot? Maybe the most cocky thing to happen in 2017 since a blogger tried to date a SportsIllustrated Swimsuit model.

Homeboy is elusive as fug.

Not once.

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Not twice.

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But 3 times this fucker was able to elude the double team. One of the best dodgers I’ve seen in my life. Slick, agile and mobile like you read about. And just look at this breakaway speed.

,,,,, holy cow ,,,,,,

But all good things in life must come to an end. And unfortunately his freedom ride came to an end in some random dude’s backyard.

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I’m hearing some reports that they bull has died. I don’t want to believe it and it’s saddening to say the least. But we can rest assured knowing he went out like a champion. We’ll never forget the lessons we learned from this little fella today. He taught us to have hope, he taught us to always follow our dreams, he taught us that running through the streets of Jamaica, Queens probably isn’t the greatest idea in the world. And most importantly, he taught us to Eat Mor Chikin (still convinced this is all a viral marketing campaign from Chick-Fil-A).

This bull went out there and he earned his freedom today. Brief, fleeting freedom. But it was freedom nonetheless. What have you done with your life today? Get up off your ass and be like this Bull. Or, idk, maybe just like don’t be a total shit head because what the bull did took way too much effort.

P.S. – Wonder how much differently the cops would have treated this situation if it were a white cow.

@BarstoolJordie