Look On The Bright Side Falcons Fans, At Least You Don't Have A Cockroach Living In Your Skull Like This Indian Woman Did

NYDN- Doctors in India found a cockroach crawling inside a woman’s skull after she visited the hospital complaining of a “crawling sensation” inside her head. Selvi, a 42-year-old domestic worker from Injambakkam, was reportedly asleep Monday night when the insect made its way up her nostril and navigated a path from there, The New Indian Express reported. She entered the Stanley Medical College Hospital Tuesday, citing severe discomfort and a strange prickling sensation.

“I could not explain the feeling but I was sure it was some insect. There was a tingling, crawling sensation. Whenever it moved, it gave me a burning sensation in my eyes,” Selvi told the newspaper. Head of ENT department, Dr. M.N. Shankar, said the crawling creature was a “fully grown cockroach” that was lodged in the woman’s “skull base, between the two eyes, close to the brain.” Shankar reassured that the cockroach was successfully removed, but the process took a bit of time.

“It was alive, and it didn’t seem to want to come out,” he said, while partner in the process Dr. S Muthuchitra added, “We had to use a combination of suction and forceps to finally pull it out.” The doctors said they have previously removed insects from people in places such as naval cavaties, but the incident was their first go-around with a cockroach, “especially not one this large,” Muthuchitra said.

*Cue Feitelberg puking noise*.

Not gonna lie, this is a pretty aggressive video to start a Monday morning. But I can’t control the news cycle and I’m sure the people that were rooting against the Patriots last night are numb to their core right now (cough, KFC, cough) and won’t even be disgusted by this. Plus it’s not like this happened in America or anything. This is India we are talking about here. I bet kids in Mumbai are born with roaches in their brains every single day. In my mind, it takes about a million people in India to be affected by something before there is even an outside chance of it happening in the good ol’ U.S. of A.

And to all the Atlanta fans that chirped Mets fans for stealing Big Sexy, I hope you enjoy him this year. Because Bartolo is going to need to win a Cy Young, hit 10+ dingers, and lead the Braves to a World Series to even begin to get the taste of last night’s loss out of your mouths. I wouldn’t even blame the Falcons if they went 0-16 next season after this Super Bowl hangover.