Crazy Courtney Stodden Just Released The Christmas Banger Of The Holiday Season "Mistletoe Bikini"

Just a heads up for those of you at work. This video isn’t technically porn but could very easily look like a porn if you’re watching it at your desk. Just wanted to put that out there. 

Move over Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You”! There’s a new holiday music sheriff in town and her name is Courtney Stodden. That music video had it all. Crazy Courtney Stodden shaking her ass all over the place, Santa Claus cheating on Mrs. Claus and a midget with a whip. That’s how you internet in 2016 folks. What a fucking insane video that was. By the way, I could sit here and say that song isn’t catching but I’d be lying and I’m not a liar. That song is incredibly catchy. Kiisssssssss meeeeeeeee under my mistletoe bikini. That’s gonna be stuck in my head until at least the new year. Is there a chance that I’m a simply a red-blooded American man and watching Courtney’s fake tits bounce all over the place persuaded me to like a pretty terrible song? I’m not ruling that out. It’s certainly a possibility. But what we all just watched (or maybe you didn’t cause you’re at work and don’t wanna get fired) is more than enough to get Courtney a record deal. Or at least sex with a record label executive. So good for her. Kiissssssssss meeeeeeeee under my mistletoe bikini.

PS- How did Courtney Stodden come out with an official Christmas song before John Mayer? Sad!