The attempted robbery, caught on surveillance video, happened Wednesday around 9:45 p.m. just before closing at Lotions & Lace. A man walked in with his face covered pointing what appeared to be a gun.
Store employee “Amy” said she wasn’t scared. She was convinced the gun was a fake and she was having none of it. “With the gun, he walked in. I just thought he was trying to be funny, to scare us,” she said. “But then I saw the gun and it was like, really? I don’t have time for this.”
I Love this woman with a capital L. Just trying to run her sex shop, and when a guy comes in with a gun, all she can think is “mannnnn, really? I don’t have time for this”. That’s the perfect response. All she wants to do is close up for the night, and now someone is being an annoyance. Like come on dude, now? I DVR’d CSI, don’t do this whole “gun in my face” bit at 9:45 at night.
So what do you do when someone has a gun in your coworkers face? You go HAM throwing dildos at them. Obviously. There’s nothing that brings a fake tough guy to his knees quicker than dildos smacking him in the face. And what a pussy that guy is. What’s the point of having a gun if you aren’t going to pull the trigger? The sex ladies sniffed out his bluff and he cowered.
PS: I’ve always wondered why more people don’t just laugh at armed robbers. Like, really, you’re going to blow my head off over the 89 dollars in the register? Just relax.
PS: Imagine still going into a sex store instead of buying your Asa Akira fleshlight on the internet. Just a different breed of person.