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This Chick's Christmas Tinder Photo Is Going To Make You Fall In Love With Her Pussy

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Okay I had to actually poorly Photoshop the cat out in the thumbnail to make the headline pun work but totally worth it. This is probably the best usage of a cat I’ve seen since those people exploited the shit out of that cat with a deformity Lil Bub. I’m not going to say it’s going to suddenly undo years of stigma around cat ladies — if anything it may only cement them further — but both she and the cat at least seem self-aware of it, that’s got to count for something. Here’s hoping they find a gentleman and a can of tuna respectively to go to town on under some mistletoe.

And hey here we are in our LAST TINDER ROUNDUP OF 2016! We’re going to do a blowout today to close the year out right, lots of funny and hot stuff, a metric ton of Spags Promises, and just good times for the whole family. Follow me on Twitter and keep DMing your screenshots (follow me on Snapchat too, you don’t have to send nudes but it is Christmas) for the 2017 Tinder roundup season premiere, thanks to the folks who sent things in, and now let’s get to the blog:

Or2x0hF

This bio made me crack up to the point where I’m willing to ignore the EGREGIOUS spelling error on chili (she’s Canadian, maybe they do it differently there)

MB-ibethertargetaudiencereadsthatandexciteddeclaresshawtygotjokes

I bet her target audience reads that and says something to the effect of “Damn shawty got jokesssss” (via MB)

BS-someoneshouldbitethebulletandwoothisgaljustsoweallknowthexperience

Someone should bite the bullet and woo this gal just so we all know the experience (via BS)

NG-yeahletmegetahandjobfromCandymanhardpasslady

Yeah let me get a handjob from Candyman, hard pass lady (via NG)

MS-ifyoudohavekidsshecouldgetyouadopedealonbabycoffinsthoLINKTORONESBLOG

But if you do have kids she could get you a dope deal on some baby coffins (via MS)

S-thecommonwealthgettingalittletoodemandinghere

The commonwealth is getting a little too demanding here imo (via S)

K-thisbiggirlshouldgetaMastersinmarketingnoquestionsasked

This big girl should get a Masters degree in marketing after this, no questions asked (via K)

POH1

POH2-thisgirlcouldbequeenoftheredneckgirls

Seems to me like this girl is the uncrowned queen of the redneck girls (via POH)

AT-thisweeksreminderyoudmaketenderlovetoawellfilteredsnapchattransgirl

This week’s reminder you make tender love to a well-filtered Snapchat trans girl (via AT)

KH-ialreadyfollowthisgirlsoiassumeshesbeenintheblogbeforebutyesiwillmakeheracertifiedfollowoftheweekagain

I already follow this girl so I assume she’s been in the blog before but yes I will make her a Certified Follow of the Week again (via KH)

RF-atlonglasticanfinallygetjerkedoffbytheincrediblehulkwithoutdestroyingapairofHulkHandsINSERTHULKHANDS

At long last I can finally get jerked off by the Incredible Hulk without ruining a set of Hulk Hands

(via RF)

RSC-almosttoowittytobeoriginal

Way too witty to be original but if it is more power to her (via RSC)

MH-sheseemstohavesomegreatlungs

She does seem to have some great lungs (via MH)

SM-notsureifjokingorjustacommunitycollegegirl

Not sure if joking or just a community college girl (via SM)

BT-saideverywomanever

– said every woman ever (via BT)

SM-shouttodevnestnatestillreppingbarstooltopickupchicksontinder

Shout to Devnest Nate still repping Barstool to pick up chicks on Tinder (via SM)

AS

(via AS)

CS1

CS2-honestlyimscared

Honestly…I’m scared (via CS)

MG-thisweekreminderatranschickishotterandhasabetterjobthanwhateverchickyoujustboughtashittyXmasgiftfor

This week’s reminder that a trans chick is hotter and has a better job than whatever chick you just bought a shitty Christmas gift for (via MG)

PE-whatkindofsadistwantsaDukeman

What kind of sadist wants a Duke man? (via PE)

R

(via R)

MK-thisonesfromtexasandyoumayhaveguessedthatwithjustthephoto

This one’s from Texas and you may have guessed that with just the photo (via MK)

JK-ifyoulikeyourchicksstrongandvaguelyresemblingabuffSeanPennindazedandconfusedheresyourshot

If you like your chicks strong and vaguely resembling Sean Penn in Fast Times At Ridgemont High here';s your shot (via JK)

And onto the hot and NSFWish ones…

RB-HOTNSFWmileycyruswouldbeproudofthisSpagsPromise

Every set of nips on every dating app, Miley Cyrus would be proud of this #SpagsPromise (via RB)

J-HOTNSFWkindofturnedonbyaspagspromiseyellingatme

Kind of a turn on to have a #SpagsPromise yell at you like that (via J)

P-HOTNSFWclassiccasewhereherwackinessis783xmorecharmingbecauseofhowfatthosetitsare

Classic case where her wackiness is 783 times more charming because of how weighty those tits are (via P)

TM-alittlehersheyskisstothespagspromise

Tis the season for a little holiday Hershey’s Kisses in your #SpagsPromise (via TM)

AIGA-HOTNSFWIwishtheyallcouldbeArizonagirlsssssss

Oh I wish they all could beeeee Arizonaaaaa girlsssssssss (via AIGA)

JA-HOTNSFWihopethisspagspromisewashesherhandsbeforemakingasubwayclub

I hope this #SpagsPromise washes her hands before making a Subway Club (via JA)

JE-HOTNSFWjezebeldotcomhasfoundahostbody

It appears Jezebel dot com has found a host body (via JE)

SV-HOTNSFW

(via SV)

CC-HOTNSFWspagspromisehasmesold

KR-HOTNSFWitsabittoofarawayofafarawaybuttshotwhenyouneedatelescopetoseeit

It’s a bit too far away of a far away butt shot when you need a telescope to see it (via KR)

JG-HOTNSFWPAIRWITHOTHERBUTTSHOTnowthatshowyoudoit

Now that’s how you do it (via JG)

MF-HOTNSFWnothinglikeawellemployedSpagsPromise

Nothing like a gainfully employed #SpagsPromise, feels more special to me (via MF)

PS-HOTNSFWreallymakesmeproudwhenspagspromisegirlshavequalitycareers

ANOTHER ONE! #SpagsPromise (via PS)

KA-HOTNSFWhippietittyspagspromisehastomakeitmovealittle

Hippie titty #SpagsPromises make it move a little (via KA)

OF-HOTNSFWprettysurethatshirtspaintedonbuyaspagspromiseallthesame

Pretty sure that shirt’s painted on but it’s a #SpagsPromise all the same (via OF)

JS-HOTNSFWohyouknowachokerplusboltonsspagspromiseismakingitinhere

No better way to close it out than a choker plus bolt-ons #SpagsPromise, a little gift for us all (via JS)

And there we have it, another week in the books. Make sure to follow me on Twitter and send in your screenshots for the big 2017 return (there may even be some exciting Swipe Drunk Love news coming on there), I hope you have yourselves Merry Christmases and happy Hanukkahs and joyous Kwanzaas, and happy swiping!