Showing Your Dick During A Verbal Dispute Is A Sign Of Dominance and I Guess Lewd Conduct Too

A 34-year-old man from Florida was arrested in Pentagon City on Friday, accused of flashing another man during a parking dispute.

The incident happened shortly before 1 p.m. Friday on the 1200 block of S. Hayes Street, near the Pentagon City mall.
“Following a verbal dispute between two parties over parking, a male subject allegedly exposed his genitals to a male victim,” according to an Arlington County Police Department crime report.

Nature is fantastic and I’m not sure why humans have tried to escape from natural things. In Alaska, brown bears will rest with their backs on trees to show you their giblets. In the ocean, male blue whales will swim on their backs to show their enormous blubbery cocks to passersby, but a Florida Man at the 1200 block of Hayes Street near the Pentagon City Mall can’t do the same? Barbaric! Barbaric! I say it again! Barbaric!

Taking the ability to scream, “I got your right of way right here, pal” whilst grabbing and thrusting your dick and under bits at your opponent really places the handcuffs on all verbal disputes hereupon. It’s tragic and I’m distraught.

There’s a precedent that must be followed after this case law is established. It’s something to keep an eye on.

Legal disclaimer: the gentlemen pictured in this article are not suspects in this case, but if you’re telling me that fella in blue jeans hasn’t his dropped trousers in a parking lot before you’re a damn liar.