Since it’s inception, 3v3 overtime has been one of the greatest additions to the beautiful game of hockey. It’s non-stop action with a constant rush of 2-on-1’s and breakaways. The only downside to 3v3 overtime is the fact that it’s so exciting that sometimes I forget to breath during it and then I feel light headed for the rest of night. Other than that, it’s perfect. You could call 3v3 a gimmick but that would also make you an asshole. It’s so entertaining that the All Star Game format has made the switch to a 3v3 tournament, the KHL just announced today that they’ll be switching over to 3v3 overtime and they usually hate anything that’s fun. And now we have the 3HL Tour starting up. The first ever professional 3-on-3 hockey league starting up on January 1st in Toronto.
There are 8 teams so far all located around the Toronto market. You’ve got Guelph, Kitchener, Milton, Newmarket, London, Toronto, Oshawa and Markham. The teams are stocked with guys who have a little NHL experience and plenty of former AHL, ECHL, NCAA and top junior talent. So sure, you may not get Connor McDavid wheeling around out there but it’s also not a bunch of bums just playing shinny. Which is why I think this is a perfect opportunity to break out that Peter Chernin checkbook and get in on the ground floor here. Barstool needs to sponsor a team on the 3HL Tour. Could do Boston, New York or Philly. Make them the Purple Starfish, offer guys like Hall and Bonino and Couture and JvR whatever amount of money they need to get out of their NHL contracts and then win championship after championship. What better way to promote the Barstool brand than by having the greatest 3v3 hockey team ever assembled in the history of planet Earth?
Now obviously I’m a bit of a beer league hero. But I’m not completely filled to the brim with hubris. I understand that I’m way out of my league here. Which is why I’m not asking for a roster spot. I think I could be best utilized as either a coach or a head hype man for the squad. Maybe take a page out of the Caleb Pressley playbook and go with the Director of Morale. Either way, this is as big brain idea as big brain ideas get. We own a professional sports team and I’m a coach. Win-win-win.