MILA'S PREGNANT!

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Des Moines Register- Happy news keeps swirling for these two. Mila Kunis, 30, and Ashton Kutcher, 36, just got engaged, and now the buzz is that they’ve got a baby on board, according to E! News, People and Gossip Cop. There’s been no official baby announcement and no word from their reps, but the two are said to be overjoyed at the bundle expected to arrive later this year. The happy couple had a courtside seat Saturday in Los Angeles to see the Clippers play the Detroit Pistons, and all eyes were on Kunis’ shape.

BIG news coming out of The Royal Couple’s camp last night.  They’re pregnant and are set to have the world’s best looking baby on the planet.  It’s true that every single baby in the history of the world is ugly.  People pretend they’re not but they’re lying and just trying to be nice to the parents.  Because in reality babies are nothing but worthless blobs of skin that don’t understand why Notorious B.I.G. was revolutionary or why Seinfeld is the greatest TV show in history.  Babies are just objects that people like to take pictures of so they can post them to Facebook and up their “Like” game.  Well that was the case before this news came out.  In the words of the aforementioned deceased rap icon, things done changed.  Ashton and Mila are about to have the first ever baby that isn’t an eye sore to look at.  Boy or girl.  How could they not?  They’re the perfect human beings.  We’d all make flowers with Mila and you’d be lying to me and yourself if you say you wouldn’t with Ashton.  Just a couple of the best looking people on planet Earth.  No chance they have a bad looking baby.  Not to mention this kid is going to be the king of the world.  He/She will walk through the streets of every town and city in Iowa and have rose peddles thrown at their feet.  I can’t wait for them to bring the baby to mid-field at Kinnick Stadium and Gary Dolphin holds the baby up like Simba while 75,000 Iowans cheer.  It’ll be a glorious day.

PS- I said in the Kiss Cam blog yesterday that I’d be open to being adopted by Ashton and Mila.  That offer still stands.  Just letting them know if they want to go the Angelina Jolie route and start adopting