Steve Jobs Ex-Girlfriend Writes Tell All Book, Says Her Sex With Him Was Profound



(WHOLE STORY HERE) Chrisann Brennan first met Steve Jobs in 1972, while they were both students at Homestead HS in Cupertino, Calif. Over the next five years, they dated off and on throughout their teens and early 20s. The two were living together with their friend Daniel Kottke, a computer engineer and one of the earliest employees of Apple, in 1977, when the company took off. It was around this time that Steve, Daniel, and I moved into a rental in Cupertino. It was a four-bedroom ranch style house on Presidio Drive, close to Apple’s first offices. Steve told me that he didn’t want to get a house with just the two of us because it felt insufficient to him………

Steve selected the bedroom in the front of the house. It was like him to want to position himself as the captain of the ship — in front. He was always vying for that superior position. I chose the master bedroom and settled in, knowing I had the best room. Daniel, who was sort of charmingly odd, slept in the living room on the floor next to his piano. But after a month Steve literally picked me up and moved everything I owned and took over the master bedroom. He’d finally realized that I had the better deal: a larger room with an en suite bath and the privacy of the backyard. Steve had paid the security deposit for the rental so was, in fact, entitled to the room he wanted. But he was so graceless that I felt humiliated and outraged.

Even after swapping rooms in this way, Steve and I still shared nights of lovemaking so profound that, astonishingly, some fifteen years later, he called me out of the blue to thank me for them. He was married at the time of his call and all I could think of was, Whoa . . . men . . . are . . . really . . . different. Imagine if I had called him to say such a thing. We remembered different things. Mainly I recalled how awful he was becoming and how I was starting to flounder. But he was right: our lovemaking had been sublime. At the time of Steve’s phone call, I found that as I listened I was as awed by the memory as by his strange need to risk an expression of such intimacy. After I hung up I stood still and thought, Maybe Steve thinks that love has its own laws and imperative. But why call now?

How about Steve Jobs having profound sex huh? That’s like the weirdest/nicest thing someone can say about your fuck game. It was profound. Not satisfying, not great, not blah, profound. Like Steve Jobs dick changed lives. That’s almost a better legacy than founding Apple. His penis had a significant impact on his ex girlfriend. Which if we’re being honest totally shocks me because I always imagined Steve Jobs to have a pencil dick. Just really skinny and weird. Total nerd dick. Just never thought a guy who wore turtlenecks could have profound sex. Profound sex is for French guys. Like people that actually do foreplay and cuddle and drink champagne and light fire. Not nerds like Steve Jobs. I guess I’m just equal parts impressed and shocked. Good for you Steve, good for you.


And thus concludes the “talking about a dead guy’s dick” portion of our day. Glad we had this talk.


h/t hatcher.