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That's It. It's Time To Declare War On The City Of Pittsburgh


READER DM: “Absolutely preposterous stuff coming from my friend at Duquesne University. Thought you’d like to see. “

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. This is the final straw. It’s time to wipe Pittsburgh off the map entirely and I’ll be glad to start the revolution. A Pittsburgh Cheesesteak? You can’t be serious. What could possibly make up a Pittsburgh Cheesesteak? A couple pieces of chopped up shit smothered in mayonnaise on a kaiser roll with some soggy french fries lazily thrown in the middle? Get that shit out of my face. I know they say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. But this crosses the line. This is an act of war and it will be reciprocated as such. How would you like it if our quarterbacks started to sexually assault women? Or if we started to not only allow incestuous relations, but to also encourage them? Doesn’t feel very good when your rival city starts to steal your style, now does it? Pittsburgh Cheesesteak. That’s the most offensive thing I’ve ever seen.

Speaking of Philly vs Pittsburgh, the Flyers vs Penguins alumni game has been set for January 14th at the Wells Fargo Center. Bob Clarke, Reggie Leach, Eric Lindros, John LeClair, Danny Briere, Simon Gagne. Ever heard of ‘em? If I’m the Penguins’ alumni team, I’d consider just not even showing up to the Wells. Save yourself the embarrassment.

h/t Tommy