I've Never Been More Jealous Of Darren Rovell

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Darren Rovell has a pretty desirable job. Despite the fact that he’s very often the punching bag of, I don’t know, the entire internet it’s still a job pretty much any of us would take in a heartbeat. He gets to go to cool events, take pictures of food before eating it like a sorority girl, hobknob with big-time athletes, and play basketball versus superstars like Kristaps Prozingis and Big Cat of Barstool Sports. But today, right this second, on September something 2016 at 10:01 AM, I’ve never been more jealous of Darren Rovell. All of those perks absolutely pale in comparison to a nice mouthful of Tom Brady nuts. Didn’t even know GOAT nuts were a thing but, then again, I still don’t totally understand goat cheese either so who am I to say what’s real and what’s not? Not many people have the pleasure of eating Tom Brady’s nut these days, but Darren Rovell is one of them and that’s why he’s the luckiest boy in the whole wide world.