Old Guy Gets Drunk At A Bar, Has A Heart Attack On The Dance Floor, Dies For 15 Minutes And Survives

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Des Moines Register- Don Roese will never listen to “Sweet Caroline” the same way again. The 83-year-old Pomeroy man doesn’t remember requesting the Neil Diamond song around 11:30 p.m. Friday at Kenny’s Pub in Waukee. Nor does he recall hitting the ground, unconscious, just moments into a dance with his daughter-in-law. Patrons who helped saved his life said the band barely made it past the first few bars before everything shifted from leisure and laughs to panic and emergency CPR. Roese experienced a severe heart attack that doctors at Mercy Medical Center later determined was caused by 100 percent blockages in two major coronary arteries. “He had no pulse and no respiratory effort whatsoever. … He was dead for almost 15 minutes,” Collins said.  Then suddenly a pulse returned, respiration began, and Don Roese began grabbing at his face with his hands. He was conscious by the time he was rolled out the door on a gurney and into the ambulance. Roese is walking, talking and laughing. He feels good except for minor restricted breathing and a sensitive chest due to the compressions performed by his rescuers.

Well god damn.  The Greatest Generation strikes again.  Showing us millennials that we’re for sure huge pussies compared to them.  Just when you thought you had a crazy St. Patrick’s Day weekend here comes Don Roese kicking in the door, cutting a rug on the dance floor to a classic Neil Diamond tune, collapsing from a heart attack and then surviving.  Two major arteries totally clogged.  A chance of survival sitting at less than one percent.  Yawn.  No big deal for Don.  That’s only the most badass party story these ears have ever had the pleasure of hearing.  Oh you thought those 15 beers and 7 shots you drank on Friday were a big deal?  Yeah man, you were hammered.  You could barely stand and were firing off texts to your ex-girlfirends like a champion.  Maybe you even slept with a fat chick.  Congrats.  But did you die for 15 minutes and then live to tell about it?  Didn’t think so.  Don is 83 years old.  I’m 25 and wholly convinced after reading that story that he could best me in any and all competitions.  Fist fight, 100 meter sprint, pie eating contest, anything.  Don beats me at all of them.  Especially a competition where each of us dies for 15 minutes and then see who can come back around and be all smiles.  That’s right in his wheelhouse.