Man Arrested For Eating A Cake Left Unattended At A Washington Court House
KELSO, Wash. – It was an odd arrest that you might say “takes the cake.” It all started Tuesday afternoon when a woman brought her 9-year-old daughter’s birthday cake to the Cowlitz County Hall of Justice. “She said she didn’t want to leave the cake in the car because the dog would get into it and eat it,” said Cowlitz County Sheriff’s Deputy Joe Connor. “So she brought it in to protect it.”
Even with three sheriff’s deputies at the metal detector, the cake wasn’t safe from the hands of Robert Eric Fredrickson. He just dug right in – no knife, no fork, no plate. Deputy Connor confronted Fredrickson at a drinking fountain as the man tried to wash the cake off his hands.
“I said ‘stand right there, don’t move.’ I went to get some towels to clean him up before I dealt with him and no sooner had I turned my back on him and he was back on the cake again. And then all hell broke loose,” Connor said. Another deputy grabbed Fredrickson’s cake-covered hand and he resisted. The table went down, the cake went flying and it turned into a story these deputies will be sweet on for at least the rest of the week. The man who helped himself to the cake was arrested on charges of third-degree theft and resisting arrest. And what about the cake that was meant for a little girl? A local Safeway bakery stepped in and replaced it.
…
…
Not sure there has ever been a larger miscarriage of justice than this story. You can’t leave cake out in plain sight and expect it to go untouched. That’s absolutely absurd. Like you know the 5 second rule for when you drop something on the ground? Well the same applies for food unattended. If I see a cake with no one around I’m eating it 100 times out of 100 times. Because guess what lady, you may have thought you were protecting your cake from your dog but when it comes down to it we’re all dogs. I’m a dog, your husband is a dog, Rodert Fredrickson is a dog and your dog is a dog. We see something we like we either hump it or eat it. That’s just dog life and the sooner you realize it the sooner you’ll figure out that cakes are meant to be eaten, not protected, baby.
PS
No one has been more proud of themselves to spit a few puns than Sergeant Joe Reiss. Cake Day jokes, best day ever.
