KHL Maniac Given Lifetime Ban For Beating Up The Entire Opposing Team

Yahoo - Having already been suspended for the remainder of the KHL preseason, Barys’ Damir Ryspayev has now been handed a lifetime ban for his actions during a brawl earlier this month. The game lasted only three minutes after first-year KHL side Kunlun Red Star abandoned the ice. Tomas Marcinko, who was sucker-punched by Ryspayev, suffered a concussion.

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BAN HAMMER, DROPPED. Lifetime suspension for your boy Damir Ryspayev for laying waste to the entire Kunlun Red Star team a few weeks ago.  His mele was insane, going after every player on the ice without fail, and then taking on the entire bench. His charade on the ice was equally as awesome as it was vicious, as he was punching and sucker punching anyone and everyone in sight.

Now, a lifetime ban is a bit strong for a guy who was just trying to set the tone. He let his emotions get the best of him (3 minutes into the game). It happens in hockey. It happens in sport. And besides, it’s not like he took off his skate and tried to stab anyone, so you have to give him credit for that.

The funniest part of this entire thing to me is the fact that he is…21 years old. 21!!!! This dude just got a lifetime ban at 21 years old. That has to be a world record of some sort. The good news for him is Putin will be for sure giving him a ring to join his coalition at any time now. That was a hell of an audition tape. And besides, I’m not sure this whole hockey thing would have worked out for him anyway. In fact, I’m not totally convinced this wasn’t self-sabotage to parlay into a job as an assassin. Russia gonna Russia, after all.