Salisbury Journal – A MAN who hid a packet of cocaine in his foreskin while naked in the car park of Homebase has appeared in court.
Joshua Hare was shouting and making a nuisance of himself at around 8.30am, prompting concerned passers-by to call police, a court heard.
Officers arrived at the DIY megastore in Southampton Road, Salisbury, where they struggled with the 24-year-old.
On Tuesday at Swindon Magistrates Court, he pleaded guilty to being in possession of 7.2 grams of cocaine.
Prosecutor Keith Ballinger described how the wrap had “emerged” from Hare’s private parts.
The substance was later tested and confirmed to be cocaine, but in interview Hare declined to comment.
Hare, who is homeless, and changed his surname from Jordan-Hare by deed poll, was represented by Nick Redhead.
Mr Redhead told the court Hare had a “troubled background” and problems with drugs and alcohol. He is also being assessed for mental health issues.
If there was ever a time to get behind the Blue Lives Matter slogan it’s right now with the arrest report of Joshua Hare. I mean you can talk about putting yourself in the line of fire all you want, dodging bullets to save lives, protecting and serving the community. We all know that. But how about having to dig into a kid’s fucking foreskin to find 7 grams of cocaine? Swimming through smegma to confiscate some blow? Yeah, nobody talks about that. Nobody realizes what it’s like to have to peel back the extra flap of loose skin on a man’s penis to fish out narcotics. Possibly more traumatizing than a live firefight.
And I know what you might be thinking – 7 grams? I mean this ain’t exactly the Pablo Escobar of Salisbury here. Somebody really had to subject themselves to foreskin expoloration to grab 0.015 pounds of booger sugar from a crazy homeless dude? Um, it’s called a War on Drugs, not the pick and choose and look the other way on drugs. That inclues kilos in a warehouse and tiny baggies in a smega covered foreskin. Thanks Nixon. – The Police