Naked Man Standing In Front Doorway Kills Wife Of 9 Days With A Crossbow In NE Philly

PHILADELPHIA — Witnesses say a man accused of fatally shooting his wife with a crossbow in Philadelphia stood naked at his own doorway as she stumbled to a neighbor’s home and collapsed in a pool of her own blood. Margie Maldonado says 42-year-old Pamela Nightlinger stumbled through Maldonado’s front door Sunday night bleeding from her chest and that Nightlinger’s husband, Paul Kuzan, was standing naked in his doorway saying “crazy things.” Maldonado says Kuzan then went back inside “like nothing happened.” Authorities say the couple had been married nine days before the killing. Kuzan is charged with homicide and related offenses. Neighbors say Sunday night wasn’t the first time Kuzan appeared naked in public and acted strangely.

I wonder what they were planning to do on the honeymoon. Joust? Because things certainty are getting medieval in the Northeast. I thought The Hunger Games mentality was reserved for the movies and North Philly. Sure, this is a tragedy. And I’m not going to speculate what made this husband go full Daryl from The Walking Dead on his new wife. I will however say that if you’re going homicidal only 9 days into the marriage, you probably should’ve thought things through a little more before getting hitched. It’s just common sense. Especially when the neighbors have seen your potential husband acting batshit with his balls in the breeze MULTIPLE times before. Not exactly marriage material.

For real though, a crossbow? Who the hell needs a crossbow in NE Philly? This isn’t West Philadelphia where you’re constantly at risk of a Jumanji situation and have to go out on Safari. Seriously, that shit happens over there.