Oscar Pistorious Is Walking Around On His Stumps In Court In An Attempt To Gain Leniency

(AP) — Oscar Pistorius removed his prostheses and hobbled on his stumps in front of a judge in a South African courtroom Wednesday, part of his defense team’s attempt to show that the double-amputee Olympic athlete, convicted of murdering girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp, is a vulnerable man who deserves leniency when he is sentenced. “Pity will play no role in the sentence,” chief prosecutor Gerrie Nel countered, asking Judge Thokozile Masipa to send the former track star to prison for 15 years, the minimum sentence for murder in South Africa.

Look, do I feel a teeny, tiny little bad for Oscar as I look at these pictures? Actually, no. The answer is very much no. Sorry, bru, you don’t get to murder someone then say ask for pity. You didn’t get rejected for being too short at the entrance of Space Mountain, you’re not asking for empathy because you’ve never been able to rock a pair of fresh Jordans, you took a human life and have the balls to ask for compassion. That don’t live here no more. I hope you get a max sentence and the whole prison opts to sing DJ UNK’s classic, “Walk It Out,” instead of chanting fresh fish while you hop your ass down the block with your dildo feet.

Tfw you just hobbled around court like a fool and the judge’s only response was a polite, “I don’t give a motherfuck.”