NDSU Released Documentary "The Road", Or An All-Encompassing Fellatio On Carson Wentz

Good stuff. I mean, I’m not going to hate on North Dakota State University for outright blowing their Ginger Jesus. Can’t. Won’t. I wouldn’t expect anything less from that state’s living legend. But as for the current Carson Wentz, it’ll soon be time to stop talking about it and start being about it. I’m rooting for the kid and am hoping for the best. If anything at least he’s already come a long way since high school…


At least he was pulling down a North Dakota 10 (Philly 6, NYC 4, Miss Detroit). I guess this kid has always had a lot of Magoo in him. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Not every Super Bowl winning quarterback needs to have the moxie of a Namath, Brady, or Montana. Hell, Russell Wilson is a certified dweeb and Joe Flacco has the personality of a stale crouton. They’ve both got rings. So I’m not gonna pass judgment until we actually see him in action. If Carson Wentz leads this Eagles team to a championship then he can shirtless hoverhand his pale ginger dick the rest of the way up Brokeback Mountain. Winning improves everything. Well, everything except Melanoma. Wentz better be rocking SPF 50 at all times or else we may lose the franchise before he could possibly start.

Also, stop this flapping the wings TD celebration possibility before it starts, please. Be creative and fire something from the crotch in honor of the red headed species.