Why Aren't All Baseball Teams Using Golden Retrievers As Bat Boys?

Well pack it up guys. Take off the hats, put the shirts away. We just stumbled upon the one thing that can undoubtedly make baseball fun again. I had no idea teams even did this and have no idea why it’s not done by more. Need more Marlos and Marleys in the game and less backhouse bare-knuckle brawls IMO. Everyone knows that if there’s one thing that can improve any sort of situation it’s throwing a dog in the mix and if we truly want to make baseball fun again Robbie Manfred would be all over this. Hell, even throw in some vouchers that allow fans to play with the pups in-between innings and you’ll have people lining up down the block.

Shhhh, you hear that Bob-o? That’s the sound of tickets being sold.