(Newser) – TGI Friday’s got hit with a double-whammy today: Not only does it have to pay the state of New Jersey a $500,000 fine, but it gets all kinds of awful publicity for blatantly ripping off its customers. Eight stores in the state settled charges that they served patrons cheap booze instead of the premium stuff they had ordered, reports NorthJersey.com. The charges stem from a sting in May that nabbed a total of 29 restaurants, 13 of them being TGI Friday’s locations. (One unnamed site sold a mixture of rubbing alcohol and caramel as scotch.) The remaining cases are still under investigation, reports AP.
First of all, if you don’t think Taffer was some way involved in this entire operation then you don’t know Taffer. There are 2 things he hates in this world. 1) People mis-handling raw chicken and 2) People fucking with the drinks. I wouldn’t be surprised if he shuts down the entire state of New Jersey for this. That’s how pissed he must be.
Second, and most importantly here. Who willingly goes to TGI Friday’s? Are there no Applebee’s or Chili’s or Outback’s in the state of New Jersey? The top 5 rankings go as follows.
5. Red Lobster – For black people.
4. Olive Garden – Unlimited bread sticks
3. Outback – Back in college I had a friend who worked at an Outback, think I broke the record for most bloomin onions eaten in a single semester. Unrelated news, I was not in shape that year.
2. Appleebees – Don’t call it Club Bee’s for nothing
1. Chili’s – Boneless buffalo wings, unlimited chips, best drinks, best all around menu.
So there it is. That’s the top 5. You can throw in Hooters (only for special occasions in my book) and you have SIX great options that aren’t TGI Fridays. TGI Fridays is like Ruby Tuesday. Boring people go there. People who drive in the right lane and give the maximum to their 401k. And guess what, those people sort of deserve what they get. Watered down drinks, and shitty food. Sort of have to assume that’s taking place at a loser restaurant like that.