If You Just Stabbed A Guy In A Bar Would You A) Get As Far Away From The Bar As Humanly Possible OR B) Stick Around And Eat A Gyro Right Outside?

Iowa Press-Citizen- A West Liberty man faces felony charges after police say he stabbed a man at a downtown Iowa City bar. Police responded early Sunday to Iowa City’s Mercy Hospital to take a report of a stabbing that had occurred at Brother’s Bar, 125 S. Dubuque St., earlier that evening, according to Iowa City police complaints. The victim told police that while in the bar restroom about midnight, he got into a verbal argument with 24-year-old Jose M. Hernandez of West Liberty, according to police. Police said that while the victim’s back was turned, Hernandez stabbed the man in the arm. After speaking with witnesses and gathering video surveillance from the bar, police located Hernandez eating a gyro on the pedestrian mall, according to police.

I’ve written blogs before about how good the food outside the Ped Mall bars in Iowa City is but this right here is a better endorsement of that food than anything I’ve ever seen.  Everybody whose ever gotten hammered in Iowa City will attest to just how good the food is in the Ped Mall.  After a hard night of boozing it’s like stumbling into a five-star restaurant (even if it’s just dirty street food, but when you’re drunk it tastes like heaven in your mouth).  There’s walking tacos, pizza, grilled cheese sandwiches, gyros, etc, etc.  Pretty much anything you could ever want it’s out there.  So take this Jose fella for example.  He’s drunk as shit at a bar, gets in a verbal altercation with another guy and eventually stabs him.  Not ideal but it happens.  Probably best to get as far away from the scene of the crime as possible.  The law frowns upon people who pull out sharp objects and plunge them into other people.  That’s just the world we live in.  So did Jose flag down the nearest cab and make his get away?  Nope.  He had to stop at the gyro stand and get himself one.  Knowing full well that the guy he just stabbed was probably talking to authorities about his whereabouts.  Didn’t matter.  The haunting aroma of the food carts was just too much to deny.  Jose needed and gyro and didn’t mind risking going to jail for it.  I can’t say I blame him.

PS- It doesn’t say in the article but the cops better have let Jose finish his gyro.  Otherwise they’re the real monsters here.

h/t derek