This Girl's Response To A Guy On Tinder Calling Her A Free Spirit Did Not End Well For Him

RwlAUMe

 

Ah the ol’ “Thought she was a free spirit or person with a significant other but turns out that she takes loads for cash” Tinder faux pas, classic mix up. But I feel like on Tinder that’s probably the most socially acceptable way you can end up paying for sex. If you go on a Backpages or Craigslist or whatever, you’re officially a Hooker Guy, paying for sex all over, giving up on the chase and ruining any chance of there being a sentiment to sex. But if you’re on Tinder, at least you’re trying to play the game the right way. If you get sales’d by some chick who turned out to be an escort well golly that’s just a cost of being an optimist trying to find love.

 

And hey so begins a special March Madness week of the Tinder blog. Any by “special” I mean “occurring at the same time as” so we’ve got that going for us. Make sure to follow me on Twitter to DM me your screenshots and let’s get into it because I’m sure we can all sober up and stop watching basketball for ten minutes to read this.

 

 

RM-FIRST

(via RM)

 

 

Punch-whathaveyoudoneserenawilliams

What has Serena Williams’ success unleashed upon us all? (via Punch)

 

 

JL-canyoupickupthehiddenmessageinthefirstline

Can you pick up the hidden message in the first line? (via JL)

 

 

 

KB-smallballisgettingoutofcontrol

The small ball movement in the NBA is getting out of hand (via KB)

 

 

OC1

OC2-happybirthdayfutureproductivememberofsociety

Happy birthday to this little future productive member of society! (via OC)

 

 

 

J-formersmokeshowcarlyfrompsuislookingforloveandwhoevermatcheswithherikindawishdeathupon

Former Smokeshow Carly from Penn State is looking for love and whoever matches with her I would like to swap places with via a magical amulet just to get a shot there (via J)

 

 

 

NM-arguablythemostaggressivebuthilariousprofileiveseen

Arguably the most aggressive but hilarious profile I’ve seen (via NM)

 

 

 

tanspray-thatshowyouknowshesclassy

“Thanks for the life long commitment of love, now you can have access to the place from which I excrete waste” – Women (via Tanspray)

 

 

D-350kfora42yearoldisthemostoutofwackrequestiveeverseen

$350K annual income and mandatory relocation to Houston for a 42-year-old looking like that is the most outrageous and delusional request I’ve ever seen (via D)

 

 

 

BC1

BC2-loverofbaconisaveryblasewaytoannounceyoureacannibal

I imagine her “love of bacon” is something like this:

 

(via BC)

 

 

SE-wellthetwotruthsandaliebiohasbeenruinedforeverthanksagainfeminism

Great, the Two Truths and a Lie bio is another thing ruined by 2016 feminism (via SE)

 

 

 

SL-soiguessthatwisdomcamefromthemominthepic

So I guess that wisdom came from her mom in the pic? (via SL)

 

 

 

US-incaseyoulikeyourhookupswithasideofnurovirus

In case you like your hookups with a side of norovirus (via US)

 

 

 

_-shouldprobablyspecificyoudontmeanthekid

She should probably specify she doesn’t mean the kid in the photo if she’s going to play so fast and loose with pronouns (via _)

 

 

DS-thisgirlwinsthewawardformostnormallookingpersonsayingbipanpolyamorous

This girl wins the award for most normal looking person ever to use the phrases bi, pan, and polyamorous to describe herself (via DS)

 

 

EC-whenyoulookatherlipsandknowshesnotkidding

When you look at her lips and know she’s not kidding (via EC)

 

 

S

(via S)

 

 

KB-ithinkitsyourcivicdutytoswiperightonanygirlwhosejobincludesmodel

I think it’s your civic duty to swipe right on any girl whose job includes “Model” UPDATE: Also people seem to think this is Nina Agdal, which I thought at first, but she has different eyebrows and didn’t go to the University of Amsterdam I thought. Plus she seems more like a Bumble chick. (via KB)

 

 

LG-soundslikeagreatwaytoendupwithyourdickcoveredinchewedupmcnugget

Sounds like a sure fire way to end up with your dick covered in half digested McNugget (via LG)

 

 

 

vaz-jemandbooradleyaregonnabesodisappointed

Jem and Boo Radley are gonna be so disappointed if they find out (via Vaz)

 

 

Nate1

Nate2

They do say that the Hayoung pussy is the sweetest (via BarstoolNate)

 

 

 

RP1

RP2-sometimesyoucantellsomeoneisthetypewhosendsallcapslockedtextmessages

Sometimes you can just tell someone is the type who’d send all caps lock text messages (via RP)

 

 

 

JM

Rough day to be a dude with a fleshy hoody on his cock head (via JM)

 

 

CR-thisiswhathappenswhenyounameyourchildlindquist

This is what happens when you name a child Lindquist (via CR)

 

 

CJ-loweredexpectationsad

 

(via CJ)

 

 

hamdawg-playingtoyourstrengths101

Playing to your strengths 101 (via Hamdawg)

 

 

MC-lostmeatsober

Lost me at “sober” (via MC)

 

 

cc-havetosuperlikeachickwithover1milinstagramfollowers

You have to superlike a chick who has over 1 million Instagram followers (via CC)

 

 

JG-notapiercednipguygenerallybutforsomereasonthisdiditforme

Not a pierced nip guy in general but for some reason this did it for me (via JG)

 

 

 

JB-hotnsfwpiercednipssohotrightnowpiercednips

Pierced nips, so hot right now, pierced nips (via JB)

 

 

 

JG-Preswouldhavethesamebioifhewereontinder

Pres would have the same bio if he were on Tinder (via JG)

 

 

S-thisisacasewheresheseemstoosweettohaveajokesluttybio

This is a case where she has too sweet of a face to have such a joke slutty bio (via S)

 

 

CT-classicwhiteguyhustlesuperlikingherwhenshesaystoswipeleft

Classic Yale hoops-caliber white guy hustle to super like a chick to try to sway her racial dating preferences (via CT)

 

 

J-imnotproudbutimrootingfora1point0GPA

I’m not proud but I’m rooting for a 1.0 GPA (via J)

 

 

 

MM-whatascavengerhuntthismustbe

What a scavenger hunt this must be (via MM)
raff-ithinkiadmireherbeingagirthgirl

I think I admire her being a girth girl, more refined vaginal palette than a girl who just wants a long one (via Raff)

 

 

DLC-shesasianstorychecksout

She’s Asian, story checks out (via DLC)

 

 

 

realest-cannothateagirlwhocanthrowabenderfromfuturamaquote

Cannot hate a girl who can throw out a Bender from Futurama quote (via Realest)

 

 

CM1

CM2-thisisareasonableresponseandagreatreminderthatifyouactuallylikeachickdontbeashitheadwhokeepsatinder

This is a reasonable response and a great reminder that if you actually like a chick not to be an idiot who keeps his Tinder bumping. You’re only a handful of charming messages away from that blowing up in your face real bad (via CM)

 

 

MW-notsureigetwhyyoudbutbrasizeinifyoureanythinglessthanaC

Not sure I get why you’d put bra size in here if you’re anything less than a C (via MW)

 

 

SG-alwaysgoodtoseesmalltitconfidencetoshowthosebigboobswhatsup

…that said, always good to see some small tittied confidence showing all those big boobed girls what’s up (via SG)

 

 

 

 

CM-ibetboththisgirlandherparentsareprettygreatbasedsolelyoffthisbio

I bet both this girl and her parents are pretty solid humans based solely upon this Tinder bio (via CM)

 

 

 

guyfierisson-atleastyouknowyoudbegettinglotsofcorninyourdiet

At least this girl would be getting a lot of corn in her diet (via Guy Fieri’s Son)

 

 

 

jc-morecheerleaderheatonbumble

Bumble is just showing off with all the cheerleaders they have now (via JC)

 

 

GM-betshethoughtthatwassosubtleandhilarious

Looks like the type of chick that I bet when she typed this in she thought this was so subtle and hilarious (via GM)

 

 

 

DH-yourcompetitionfortheweekmusthavealotofpeanutbutterinhishousetokeepthedogonpoint

Your competition for the week must keep a lot of jars of peanut butter on deck just to keep the dog on point (via DH)

 

 

JP1-thailandtinderhascomecolorfulhobbies

JP2

Thailand Tinder seems to have some colorful hobbies (via JP)

 

 

JT

(via JT)

 

 

 

TH-anothersatisfiedvisitortoflavortown

Another satisfied visitor to Flavortown(via TH)

 

 

DCF-guessyoucantgetitsthatbigbeingjustabreastaugmentationpasserby

Guess you can’t get tits that big just being a Breast Augmentation Dabbler (via DCF)

 

 

LD-FUCKOFF

Oh just fuck off with this, it’s the weekend (via LD)

 

And onto the hot and NSFWish ones…

 

 

PH-questionofthedaycouldyouactuallydateachickwhopostspicslikethisonbumble

Question of the day: For as hot as this may be, could you actually date a chick who posts aggressive pics like this on her Bumble profile? (via PH)

 

 

SD-hotnsfwfarawaybuttshots

Far away butt shots, you make my day (via SD)

 

 

EW-clichebiogreatbutt

Cliché bio, above average butt (via EW)

 

 

DH-hotnsfw

Whatever happened here must be a great story in some guy’s life (via DH)

 

 

HK-hotnsfw

Way better than that other Aleeyah (via HK)