Go and feed the seagulls they said. It’ll be fun they said. Bet they didn’t mention the part where an asshole octopus rises from the depths and drowns a poor seagull as grown ups and children alike look on in horror. They sure as shit left that part off the brochure. I’m longtime #TeamFuckTheOcean #TeamFuckBodiesOfWater and I’m getting a little sick and tired of people not seeing what’s right in front of them. Like an octopus snatching up an innocent seagull and holding it under water until its wings stop flapping. I honestly think we should nuke the ocean. Just nuke it. Give North Korea something to do. Why not? Actually, don’t tell me why not. Just do it. I make this point time and time again but horrific creatures like the octopus is a water creature that’s willing to show its face. 98% of the species in the ocean and in water aren’t known. Think of the horrifying shit that lurks below. Things science textbooks don’t know about. Nuke those mother fuckers. I don’t care how much it hurts the environment. Save the dolphins though.