Finish This Meal For $25,000 | Barstool's Most Dangerous Gameshow FinaleWATCH NOW

Crackhead Has No Idea How The Crack In His Mouth Got In His Mouth

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 10.23.50 AM

Miami - A sleeping man was found with a bag of crack dangling from his mouth. Not mine, Eric Smith, 45, told cops. Vero Beach police hauled him in to jail anyway on Feb. 15 and charged him with cocaine possession, according to the report. Smith was found in the stairway of an apartment building with the bag of white powder in his mouth. He said he didn’t know how the drugs got in his orifice.


You know what? I believe this guy. That crack was not his. He was just trying to catch a snooze in the stairway of a random apartment building and next thing you know…

Ah ha! I knew I had heard this story before somewhere. Cops going around, sprinkling crack on people trying to sleep/looking dead in stairwells. A story as old as time itself. Imagine his confusion when the crackhead woke up with a bag of crack in his mouth. I feel like if it was his he would have been like awwww shucks, ya got me. This was all a set up, I’m sure of it.

And if it wasn’t…


Feel like crack is one of those things that goes under-appreciated by society. Like, who does CRACK? Somehow crack has become such an obscure drug that it’s the best drug to make jokes about. Crack is never not funny.

Screen Shot 2016-02-26 at 10.38.14 AM