GASP! Peyton said adults drink alcohol when they’re happy! I jokingly made fun of Peyton mentioning it, just because it sounded so weird, but you’ve gotta be another level of loser to actually be offended by a Super Bowl quarterback saying he wants to get drunk and celebrate. Sando’s phone must be a goddamn party on Friday afternoons with all his friends calling to see what’s on for the evening. Everyone loves to hangout with the guy who gives them a sobriety test when they head out the door and side eyes them when they ask for another drink, saying “Are you sure you really need that, Jim?” Fuck off, Sando. Trying to have a good time over here, go raise your own kids.
And make sure they’re nowhere near a TV when an adult completes their lifelong dream.