Apparently 1980s Ford Escorts and Cortinas Are Now Considered Classic Cars and Are Being Stolen All Over the UK

UK – Criminal gangs are targeting 1980s classic cars, motorbikes, vans and campervans according to the International Association of Auto Theft Investigators (IAATI). The IAATI is urging owners to invest in security equipment as the crime trend shows no sign of abating across the country and particularly in South East England. Ken German, communications director at IAATI UK said a recent Home Office report highlighted the threat which has seen modern classic vehicle thefts continue into 2016. “The South-East is the hotspot, probably due to the speed at which vehicles can be moved out of the country to Europe and beyond,” Mr German said. “Models such as Cortinas and Escorts were changing hands for a few hundred quid a decade ago, but as their numbers have dwindled they have become increasingly desirable. “I’ve heard theories that they might be being stolen for banger racing or parts, but I suspect it’s all about the resale value. Enthusiasts and collectors will pay thousands, sometimes tens of thousands of pounds for a nice example. “When you add in the fact that most don’t have the security systems that come as standard on modern cars, you can see the attraction for criminals. “Classic vehicle owners need to react, first by dismissing the idea that “it won’t happen to me” and second by taking practical steps to protect their asset.” Owners of such vehicles are being warned to install alarms, engine immobilisers, tracking devices and the new DNA invisible markings can all be wise investments.

 
Yikes. Try being the guy who has to walk into an auto shop asking for a security system to install on his ’85 Ford Cortina that was worth less than the alarm itself like 10 years ago. I guess that’s where we are now with cars from that era though. The 80’s are now considered “classics”. I know there’s a cult group that loves them but that whole decade of cars just look shitty to me. You can just imagine a bunch of coked out car execs saying, “What if we just eliminated curves from the car? We could cut costs that way and then have more money… to buy more coke!” Respect the hustle. Hate the results.

You know there’s only 1 80’s car from the list of 50 cars they steal in Gone in 60 Seconds? Can you imagine if that movie had to have these “classics” in it? The big blacklight board of car nicknames would have been littered with gross girl names instead of good ones. After stealing Ingrid and Phyllis, Nic Cage would need to move on to the Myrtle and Gertrude in order to save his brother before dawn. And I certainly can’t imagine Memphis Raines dropping a “what about having sex while boosting cars” line while Angelina Jolie was riding shotty in a 1985 Escort instead of a 90’s Lambo. I think she’d probably dehumidify the passenger seat.