These are our kind of people. People who laugh at the little things in life. Anyone who reports on an “emergency defecation situation” and doesn’t burst into tears of laughter takes their job much too seriously. Like, the trial apparently is about something serious like a guy stalking a woman then taking a shit on her doorstep. But the fact that a judge, who went to law school, had to determine the motive between a guy having an “emergency defecation situation” or if it was sexually motivated is absolutely hysterical. If that lady gets fired then her boss is a loser. By the way, I will absolutely be using “emergency defecation situation” all the time now. Whenever I drink a large Starbucks coffee I instantly have an emergency defecation situation. Whenever I get the cinco enchilada platter with beans and rice at a Mexican restaurant, I find myself in Emergency Defecation Mode. I guarantee saying “emergency defecation situation” gets a laugh from your friends 1,000 out of 1,000 times. Give it a shot.