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Ruthless Philadelphians Murder Defenseless Reporter With Snowballs

Oh the humanity!!! Lock these scumbags up and throw away the key!!! Haven’t we learned our lesson after killing Santa from the rafters of Franklin Field 50+ years ago?

Seriously though these jackasses and their harmless fun just lit fire to Philly on the Internet with all the “Snowballs at Santa” Twitter eggs who think they’re hysterical. But I’m not gonna lie, those GIF are hilarious. Poor girl is on a shitty assignment covering a blizzard and has to endure friendly fire from all angles. She’s lucky, too. Snowballs are bb gun pellets compared to the artillery fire of a snow plow.

PS – American Blizzard Warrior to the rescue with your hammered 3am reports. Hurricane Schwartz’s got nothing on this noggin. And we shall be blitzed and sledding on a trashcan lid down the Art Museum Steps by noon. A pure Delco move but dammit, it has to be done.