The Man With the Bionic Penis Was All Set To Lose His Virginity To A Hooker Until He Got In A Car Crash

Metro - The man with a bionic penis who was supposed to lose his virginity to a dominatrix will now have to wait even longer. Mohammed Abad, 43, was run over by a car in 1978, when he was just six years old, in Huddersfield. The car dragged him along 600ft, slicing off his penis in the process. After getting fitted with an eight inch bionic member, he revealed that he’d made plans to lose his virginity to 35-year-old sex worker and failed MP Charlotte Rose. But the date has been put on hold, because Abad has been involved in another car accident. According to the Scottish Sun, Abad was rushed to hospital after riding as a passenger in a BMW that collided with another car. He was treated for a broken ankle, two deep head wounds and concussion. However, it’s just a temporary delay. ‘I have waited long enough, so another couple of weeks won’t make much difference,’ Abad said.

——-

I wonder if he’s just not supposed to ever have sex. It’s Final Destination type shit with his dick. It has to be. The Universe works in mysterious ways. Some people just aren’t meant to fuck. He’s one such person. You can’t tell me it’s pure coincidence that he lost he dick at 6 years old, didn’t get a new one until he was 43, and when he was all set to fuck, got in another car accident. You simply can’t tell me there’s not a higher power saying nope, your dick is not supposed to enter a vagina. Mohammed Abad just needs to sit the next few plays out. When the Universe won’t even let you pay for pussy that’s when you realize it’s simply not meant to be. And realistically, how good can sex with a fake 8 inch dick feel for him? Sounds like they just sewed a strap-on to his waist above his balls. I don’t know how he didn’t kill himself years and years ago. You’re telling me his dick fell off at age 6 and he’s been living a normal ho-hum life ever since? If I’m 6 year old Mohammed Abad I’m going straight to Al Jazeera and signing up for terrorist camp.