Nothing Worse Than Seeing Somebody Wearing The Same Jacket You Are

So I was minding my own business this morning getting my coffee when this dude struts in line right in front of me. Just peacocking it around the ring like he doesn’t have a care in the world wearing the same exact jacket I was wearing. THE SAME EXACT JACKET! Total day killer. I mean just nothing worse than seeing some schmoe wearing the same exact shit you are. Unless it’s like Leonardo DiCaprio or something. But this was just a run of the mill 9 to 5’er. Guy was balding, definitely had kids and I’m sure his idea of a party is watching Survivor on Wednesday Night. I wanted to rip my coat of his boring ass body. Now I can’t wear my jacket ever again. It just reeks of averageness. Of mediocrity. Of riding the subway. Nothing will set back a mogul like wearing the same jacket as common folk. Worst Day Ever.