Twitter Plans To Remove The 140 Character Limit
“What about sextupling down?” – Dave Portnoy
CNBC – Twitter is working on a new product that will let users post tweets longer than the current 140-character limit, Re/code reported citing people familiar with the company’s plans. It is unclear what the product will look like, Re/code said. The 140-character limit has been a trademark of Twitter since its inception, but expanding it has been a topic of internal debate for several years and has resurfaced since Jack Dorsey took over the reigns as interim chief executive in recent months, according to multiple sources. Executives at the U.S. social media firm have been looking into tweaking how Twitter measures the 140-characters by removing things like links and user handles from the count, Re/code said. The discussions about changing the 140-word character limit come as Twitter struggles to attract users.
Alright let me just say this – if Twitter makes it so that you can hyperlink in a tweet without that taking up characters, I may consider allowing this. Drives me fucking nuts that if I wanna link to a blog or iTunes or something it eats like 25 characters. Only Baseball Outs are more precious than Twitter Characters. Cant be wasting so many of them on links. Just offer a hyperlink button so you can highlight your words with the website like a normal 2015 internet product.
Other than that this is a terrible idea. Twitter being 140 characters is the best thing thats happened to the internet. First off its made me almost completely remove apostrophes from my life. What a goddam waste of time apostrophes are. Like youre not gonna know what word I mean if I type “cant” instead of “can’t.” Fuck outta here, apostrophes. But more importantly 140 characters forces you to be a concise, brief, asshole. Which is exactly how I want to interact with everyone in my life. I wish real life had a 140 character limit. Get. To. The. Fucking. Point. Dont need extra details. Dont need you rambling on and on. With the 140 character limit it makes everyone put it all on the table right away. You wanna babble on and on about a topic? Have a full blown argument? Go over to reddit or kill yourself or something. If you need me, I’ll be the guy on Twitter thats boiling down very complex, multi layered to one sentence. My favorite type of exchanges are these:
Me: True Detective season 2 was the sloppiest season of writing I’ve ever watched. Pizzolatto got too cocky, that shit sucked.
Some Twitter idiot: It goes much deeper than you think it does. When comparing the writing styles of Nic Pizzolatto to the other writers of his genre (1/3) …
Some Twitter idiot con’t: (2/3) con’t you realize its just classic noir writing. His style is often over people’s heads and interpreted wrong. I cant fully explain…
Some Twitter idiot fucking con’t again: (3/3) …over twitter but if you send me an email I can explain why this was the greatest season of TV ever.
Me: @sometwitteridiot: nah that shit really sucked.
Bingo bango, argument over. Im right you’re wrong, I’m big youre little, I’m smart you’re dumb. Or how about this one:
Me: This Derek Jeter Farewell tour is fucking ridiculous. Someone please stop this insanity. So over the top I dont think Jeets even likes it.
Another Twitter idiot: KFC you are such a fucking idiot. Do you not respect baseball? He’s the Captain of the New York fucking Yankees. Hes the shortstop of the…
Another Twitter Idiot 2: most historic franchise in sports. Hes won 5 rings. Most clutch player ever. If you dont respect Jeter you dont respect…
Another twitter idiot 3: baseball. Stop being such a miserable prick and re2pect greatness.
Me: @anothertwitteridiot: Derek Jeter doesnt need a paddle board from the Arizona Diamondbacks.
Bam. Ether. Cuncel da argument.
If you cant live your life 140 characters at a time, 2015 is not for you. You need to be put out to pasture. Dont need my twitter timeline turning into some facebook ass face feed. “I dont usually do this but I just had to express my thoughts on the latest police brutality…” yada yada yada. “Today I marry my BEST FRIEND and the girl who has completely turned my life into a blessing filled with…” blah blah blah. “7 years ago on this day my father died and…” babble babble babble. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. 140 characters for life. If they expand I’ll continue with a self imposed 140 limit, thats a promise.
PS – This blog was 3529 characters.