Your options are:
A. A drug king pin with 300 pounds of cocaine, a full artillery of automatic weapons in his basement and a thirst for police officer blood lived there.
B. A person who might’ve stole somebody’s credit card lived there.
C. A smut blogger who had a 19 year old superstar teen sensation tied up in his office and naked pictures of the son of a three-time Super Bowl champion quarterback in his possession lived there.
Alright so maybe the force they used was a tad excessive for the potential charge against this person but on the flip side I sort of love this move from the Ankeny SWAT team. I mean, come on. How often does the Ankeny SWAT Team really get to break out the big toys and kick in somebody’s door like they’re LL Cool J and Colin Farrell? Never, right? This might surprise you but Ankeny, Iowa isn’t exactly a hotbed for big time criminal activities so opportunities like this are few and far between. You’re not breaking out the hardcore gear every other week. That’d be like having a Ferrari and just letting it sit in the garage. That’s no fun. You have to take that baby out every once in awhile, let the world know you have a fucking Ferrari and maybe pick up a chick that’s outta your league. Same goes with SWAT equipment. Why have riot shields and huge rifles if they’re just going to sit in a locker at the police station? You gotta break those bad boys out and use them from time to time.
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