First: This dude was definitely jerking off. I occasionally enjoy lounging on the couch with a hand down my pants like Al Bundy but the big difference there is the hand isn’t moving around. This dude’s FUPA was moving like a water bed as he stroked his Silly Putty pud to some iPhone porn. But secondly “Listen if you think that’s jerking off, I feel bad for you man” is such a sick denial by this dude. “You think that’s jerking off? I’ll show you what jerking off really is!” That’s either a terrible put-down or a very smooth come-on by a dude jacking off at work at a gas station who clearly has precious few standards. He probably has a little glory hole under the Wild Burst Skittles for such an occasion, really adds a whole unintended dimension to Skittles’ branding there.
Also as far as I’m concerned, the guy doing the filming was a class act. Other than the filming it part, that’s about as polite as you can be when catching a creepy looking fat man jerking off at a place you’re trying to make a purchase. I get you’d be mad getting busted jerking it regardless of circumstance, as this inopportune masturbator proved, but if I’m going to get embarrassingly caught cranking it by someone who’s not a hot stepmom in a Reality Kings porn video it’d be this guy.
PS Coming back after a long weekend for Labor Day and I immediately stumble upon a video of a guy caught jerking off. That’s what’s called letting your blog game come to you. Perhaps literally in this case.