This Is The Face Of A Woman Who Stabbed Her Boyfriend After He Threatened Her Pet Turtle

NBC - Authorities say a Palm Beach County woman has been arrested for stabbing her boyfriend after he threatened to hurt her turtle. The sheriff’s office reports that 53-year-old Marie Seymour of Lake Park faces charges of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon in the Tuesday incident. She was released from jail after posting $3,000 bond Wednesday, records showed. Seymour told deputies she was drinking with her boyfriend when he made the threat and then came after her. Authorities haven’t said where the man was stabbed or how badly he was hurt. The Palm Beach Post reports he was taken to a Palm Beach Gardens hospital. The name of the turtle was not released.

Well when you threaten the family pet, you deserved to get stabbed. It’s really that simple. I know, she has a turlte. It’s a weird fucking pet to own. What good is having a pet turtle? None. Basically nothing good comes from having a pet turtle, so I do believe the unnamed turtle is partly to blame. He’s not as innocent in this story as they want you to believe. So while it’s slightly her fault for owning the turtle, the guy knew what he was getting into the second he found out his chick had a turtle. I just can’t imagine walking into a chick’s home and having her rationally explain that she has a turtle. And what if they walk it and shit like that? That’s insane behavior. Not quite as bad as having a pet bird, but it’s up there. But again, you can’t just come out threatening the thing like that. So sometimes you have to stab a dude to put him in his place. Sad, but true.