Move Over Michael Jordan There's a New GOAT in Chicago

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the RED PANDA!! Fuck Michael Jordan, anyone can win 6 rings with the Jerry Krause, Phil Jackson, Scottie Pippen, and my idol Dennis Rodman. But NO ONE, and I mean NO ONE is flipping 6 fucking bowls on their dome piece while riding a unicycle. Not only is this girl balancing herself with one leg, but she's keeping all the bowls she already flipped on her dome piece on her head, and then she has the balls to sit there and place 6 more bowls on her fucking leg, and some how flip them into the other 4 bowl that are already on her dome piece. This LEGEND, flipped 10 fucking bowl onto her dome. 

Anyone can dunk from the foul line these days, but no one in the NBA is flipping 10 bowls onto their dome on a fucking unicycle. I'm convinced that 90% of the people at the games only go to see her. Why would I spend money on a team who's best player is Alex Caruso? No disrespect, Alex can hoop, but he ain't worth $80 a ticket. The Red Panda on the other hand? Shit, I'd pay $200 bucks to see her flip cups on her dome for an hour. If ever go to a Bulls game do NOT miss the half time show. Odds are it'll be the highlight of the night.

Editor's Note: Watching Nicky Smokes grow up and learn new things is so endearing. He just discovered Red Panda and I think that's great. Following his journey is delightful.