The Bengals Succumbed To Murphy's Law In Foxborough And SOMEHOW SURVIVED!!

Matt Fitzgerald12/24/2022 10:00 PM

OH MY GOODNESS WHAT AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER. Until this fumble was recovered by Cincinnati, I was just about ready to crawl into a figurative turtle shell for the rest of the holidays and not come out until the Bengals' Monday night game against the Bills.

Not really. I would've taken this loss on the chin. Fully prepared to do so, because let's be honest, the Bengals deserved to lose this one.

You can blame officiating all you want. And I will to a degree in a second here. Bottom line is, the Bengals damn near suffered one of the more stunning collapses in recent NFL history on Sunday. They had numerous opportunities to put the Patriots away. Instead, Mac Jones kept converting improbable 3rd and long situations, and Cincinnati outright failed to ice the game away despite moving the ball seemingly at will all afternoon.

In case you're unfamiliar with Murphy's law for some reason, Google says it's as follows: "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong." Once the Bengals took a 22-0 lead into halftime, that's essentially what happened.

Look at this shit from Kendrick Bourne, including an extremely dubious catch in which, I don't know, the ball touched out of bounds and clearly moved when it hit the ground?

I won't soon forget the fuckery that was afoot on this Mac Jones "forward pass" that could've easily been a Germaine Pratt fumble recovery TD:

Then of course this 3rd and 29 PRAYER. As if the football gods haven't smiled upon the Patriots enough during their, you know, SIX SUPER BOWLS in the Bill Belichick era.

Ja'Marr Chase had a fine performance overall. His eight receptions for 79 yards were only eclipsed by Tee Higgins' eight for 128. Trenton Irwin scored two TDs, too! The receiving corps ate today! HAVING SAID THAT, dear lord, Ja'Marr had me worried when this went down:

For fuck's sake. Talk about Murphy's law!

If you told me going into halftime when Joe Burrow had accomplished THIS:

…That the Bengals would find a way to lose, not gonna lie, I wouldn't be 100% shocked. This game had weird vibes from the start. It was a little too easy early on. I was convinced the elements would somehow work in New England's favor. Thought maybe there'd be some trap game potential looking ahead to Week 17's Monday night showdown with the Bills. Just weird, weird, weird.

What's clear as day is Cincinnati hasn't played anywhere near its best football, nor has the team played a complete, 60-minute game all season long. To still own an 11-4 record in spite of that speaks to just how high of a ceiling the Bengals have — and how non-flukish their run to last year's AFC title was.

These are the types of games championship teams find a way to win. It's cool that the Bengals can basically fall the fuck asleep for halves at a time and still emerge victorious. I think it's kind of the perfect problem to have as the playoffs approach. Plenty of results to be proud of amid a seven-game winning streak, yet there's NO WAY that locker room is getting complacent about where they're at. They know they have to be better to make another deep run in the postseason. I suspect they'll recognize that and make the necessary corrections, as they're wont to do of late.

To invoke Bill Belichick's famous "we're on to Cincinnati" quote to essentially bury the tape from whatever the hell just happened in that second half, as a Bengals person, we're on to Buffalo.

The final two games of the regular season are at home, and the Bengals have full control of their destiny as far as winning the AFC North, with a chance to seize at least the No. 2 seed by winning out. Lots to be thankful for — even if we the proud citizens of Who Dey Nation know that our team has absolutely not reached its peak yet.

Sorry to all the other Patriots faithful. No way to sugarcoat it. This was a brutal one. I'll play you out with El Pres in the spirit of balanced journalistic integrity and objectivity but only kind of.

Twitter @MattFitz_gerald/TikTok

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