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PSA: Don't Propose To Your Girl At A Minor League Baseball Game Unless You Want To Get Turned Down And Embarrassed In Front Of Thousands Of People

Notice how I didn't say that this was real in the headline because to be honest, I have no fucking idea if this was staged or not which is why I didn't blog it when it first happened. Everything about it seems fake from the matching outfits, to the perfectly orchestrated exit, to minor league teams being willing to do whatever the fuck it takes to go viral in order to sell even one more ticket. It's honestly shocking that the minors haven't struck a deal with that porn site that offers money to every person whose name appears in a Google News alert to be nude on camera (I'll put their name in the blog if they Venmo $1000 to @TheClemReport). 

However, during my many years on this planet I have learned one discernible truth and it's that if there is one group of people you can trust, it's people with tattooed thighs like the lovely young lady in this video here. If you are trying to tell me she staged all this in order to get a few extra butts in the seats of a future WooSox game, I'll have to tip my cap and call her daddy. Are we still allowed to say that here? Whatever, it doesn't matter. 

What matters is that the minor leagues are everything America was built on. Hustling and doing whatever is necessary to make headlines and cash. So whether or not this video was actually a man getting his soul ripped out of his chest or an effort by a minor league team to go viral using two actors or employees of the club, the bottom line is it got people like me to watch and people like you to click the blog. To be honest, the only reason I blogged it is because people seemed to be going crazy about it on the New York Post, where they WooSox said they had nothing to do with it at all.

“It was definitely not a stunt in any way by the club — and every indication from those involved was that it was sincere,” said Bill Wanless, vice president of communications for the Worcester Red Sox. “But we haven’t heard anything from the parties involved.”

For the record, whether this video was real or fake, I still don't think you should propose to your woman at a minor league park unless she is a DIEHARD baseball fan that makes Carrabis look like a casual. But if you do, make sure your friends are filming it and then have them send it to @TheClemReport on Instagram if she says no so I can get those clicks and views.