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Last Night, Barstool Sports Commenter "Gerald Broflosky" Had The Greatest Idea In Human History

Last night, I posted a blog about this fight going down at Sox Park:

And I gave some half assed write up rating the fight on a pizza scale and blah blah blah. I think it's a total white trash move to get into a fight at a sporting event but it's also something that will never go away. Just happens when you get a bunch of drunk hill rods in the same place. 

Giphy Images.

I scrolled down to the comment section to see if anyone was bashing on the best team in baseball, the Chicago White Sox, so I could combat them with my baseball big brain. Much to my delight, most of the comments were bashing on the people in the fight and not me or the Sox. That, my friends, is a perfect evening. 

The birth of the greatest idea of all time was also down there courtesy of Gerald Boflosky. I'll cut right to the chase.

GENIUS. We're talking Einstein and the Theory of Relativity level genius… Or whatever it was that lead to us ending WWII with The Bomb. Think about it: Are you at a baseball game? Are you drunk?  Do you want to cave another overweight, tatted up, fat hillbilly's face? DO YOU WANT TO PULL A RANDY MARSH???

Okay fine, you're allowed to do that, but under conditions. You have to go to the Pig Pen (that's what I'm gonna call it), fight like men, or don't. It'll give you an opportunity to think about the scumbaggery of what you're about to do and if that doesn't stop you, you get put on blast on the internet.

I know people might think I'm joking here, but I'm really not. This is an awesome idea, and it's an awesome idea because of the very last sentence in the first comment: all proceeds go towards child protective services. 

Touch em all Gerald!!!

It'd be the biggest spectator sport of all time. Rough 'n Rowdy might be forced into bankruptcy. Child protective services would get their money. And if none of that happens? 

Then we don't got a bunch of shirtless, out of shape, fat, white trash dudes fighting in the bleachers anymore. It's a win/win/win/win/win. There's NOTHING bad that can come of it.