I Regret To Inform Everyone That Jarred Kelenic Has Been Sent Down To Triple A After Batting .096 In 23 Games

A little bit of housekeeping here on Barstool Sports (dot) com. After being tagged in God knows how many tweets by random people whose bios say they root for the Mariners, Yankees, or NL East teams other than the Mets, I blogged that Jarred Kelenic had finally made it to the Majors.

So now I am here to blog that Kelenic has been sent down to the minors less than a month later with a batting average you would hear at a BINGO game. They don't get more thorough than your ol' pal Clem here.

To be clear, hearing a 21-year-old got sent down to the minors brings me no joy at all. First of all, I still refuse that it's true because that boob Bob Nightengale tweeted it. But there is also no denying that Kelenic is still a baby in baseball years, has looked good in the minors, and is beloved by pretty much every scout that has ever seen him. Plus I don't want it to be weird between Jarred and I if he becomes a star and Uncle Stevie scoops him up in however many years it takes for Kelenic to become a free agent since baseball free agency is always so annoying with service time shit and arbitration years.

Besides, Mets fans have bigger things to worry about with their first place team. Edwin Diaz is an elite closer, Robinson Cano hasn't cost the Mets a penny this year, not enough trolls realize that 25-year-old Justin Dunn as well as his 3.69 ERA was included in Brodie's Folly as well, and the Mets best player has outhit Kelenic this season.

Giphy Images.

Also regardless of if Kelenic hits like Fernando Tatis Jr. or Fernando Martinez in the Bigs, I think it's fair to say that the Mets won the trade simply based on this glorious symphony coming into our lives.