Shohei Ohtani Blasted His MLB Leading 13th Homer On a Pitch At His Fucking Eyeballs

Mike Trout left today's Angels game with a calf strain so Shohei decided he'd become superman. That's the only explanation for hitting a home run on that pitch. Motherfucker pulled it too on top of everything. The police should have been waiting at home plate to arrest this dude for witchcraft. 

94 mph half a mile above the zone near Shohei Ohtani's head and this maniac sends it 431 feet over the right field wall. Laugh out loud preposterous. Just another day at the ol' park for this behemoth . 

I howled when CC Sabathia called Ohtani the best baseball player he's ever seen, but now I think I'm on his side. This alien leads the majors in home runs while sporting a 2.10 ERA on the mound, throwing 101 mph whenever he feels like it. His splitter is also one of the most unhittable pitches in the entire league. Oh yeah he also has elite speed compared to the rest of the league because why the fuck not? They wouldn't let you create a player like this in the Show. 

He might mess around and win the Angels some games too if he's not careful. 

P.S. Jared didn't blog this yesterday for some reason, but figured it was worth mentioning since Ohtani is becoming the new face of baseball and he brought the Halos back from the dead on their final swing yesterday.