Bears Fan Gets His Face Caved In By A Homeless Dude With A Hammer, Wakes Up And Asks If The Bears Landed Russell Wilson Yet

...... DRUM ROLL PLEASE ......

NOPE! They didn't land Russ.... Not yet they didn't. Sorry Sam. But I got a sneaky suspicion they're about to for no reason at all... other than the fact that Vegas odds for the Bears winning the Super Bowl improved last night and this morning you couldn't even bet them to acquire Russ. That and apparently Akiem Hicks (who would be a casualty of the acquisition) unfollowed the Bears on social media apparently. Sooooooo I hate to break it to ya Sam but you might have taken that hammer to the orbital bone for no reason. Hope the Bears do land Russ for you.

In the mean time, everyone should be hammering away on the Barstool Sportsbook App (responsibly, of course, if you have a gambling problem call 1-800-gambler) now that it's live and fully functioning in Illinois. Rico is in town and he's WHITE HOT right now. Tail him and make yourself millions upon millions and retire to a Caribbean resort