Devin Booker Says He's Seen A Bunch Of Guys In The NBA Shit Themselves During A Game

NBA players are just like offensive linemen. I've always said, you've always thought it. Sure they may not be 'tough' like linemen and sure they might not be as aggressive. But they shit themselves just like offensive linemen. That's a special kind of crazy. We all know Paul Pierce shit himself when he got carried off the court in a wheelchair. 

We even remember the time James Harden had some streaks

Now here's what I don't get. There's plenty of time to shit before a game. Everyone that's played even high school basketball knows the key is a solid pregame dump at the right amount of time before a game - preferably around an hour out. You also know you're wearing white so you gotta be extra careful. Clog that shit up if you have to, literally. Take some pepto like you're Dick Vitale. 


If you're on the road by all means shit your brains out. But I get it for football. You're getting hit in the body at all places. That fart isn't just a fart and it's time to panic. Football players are also wild. They do it for a competitive advantage. Nobody wants to rush the stinky guy. Basketball? You're not getting punched in the gut. You should be able to hold in some bubble guts. 

On the flip side shitting yourself and faking an injury is better than the look Lamar had: 

There are cameras everywhere now and you don't want your marquee highlight to be you waddling to the locker room as you're poking out. That's not good for sponsorship business. And you for sure don't want to be mic'd up like our guy Donnie: 

I gotta know who are the most common shitters. Imagine if it's Boban. That would be terrifying. Boban in the post holding the ball 3 feet above your head as he smells like leftover Tuna. No thank you. I'm sure Kyrie has done it and passed it off as some sort of ritual. Jimmy Butler has 100% shit himself. You don't become the face of coffee and be an extreme competitor like Butler without some shit in your drawers. That's just a stone cold fact. 

So the next time you see someone faking an injury wearing white shorts just know what happened. It's poop.