If you have gone within 1000 yards of a social media account, you already knew that the Texans cut JJ Watt thanks to millions of quote retweets to the Rap Bomb of people adding very constructive things like "Wow" or idiots like myself trying to link JJ to their team.
However, the other side of that Rap Bomb is the destruction it laid in Houston, which has pretty much become a nuclear bomb testing ground for the local teams. I was starting to piece together all the shit they've gone through down there the last few years, but my Twitter pal Nick did it for me.
Jeeeeeeesus Christ. Nothing like losing a bunch of players that were either former MVPs, the best at their position, or at worst the heart and soul of your teams that came up huge in massive moments. Losing two 3-2 leads in championship series must feel like getting your heart cut out with a knife, while losing a 3-2 lead to your superteam rival because you missed 27 straight threes must feel like getting your heart cut out with a spoon.
To make this clear, I will never feel bad for any Rockets fan because their team lost a big game because they couldn't hit a three since this partially blocked miss three that would've won the Knicks a title back when sports meant way too much to me has haunted me my entire life.
I don't know why I just did that to myself and every other Knicks fan that remembers that game. If that shot goes in, there is no 2-for-18 in Game 7, John Starks is a New York hero, and I wouldn't have felt gutted every time the Knicks came up short in the playoffs because they would've had a title before James Dolan took over in the 21st century and beat me down as a Knicks fan to the point I can no longer feel feelings as a fan.
Anyway, back to those sad sons of bitches in Texas. You cannot ignore that Houston won a championship before all this mayhem started. Trust me, as someone who has bitched and moaned about his teams for decades, I can't ignore that Eli Manning defeated the greatest coach, quarterback, and dynasty the sports world has ever seen for a championship. Twice. Once when that GOAT combo was mere minutes away from going undefeated.
Sorry, I needed that after reliving the Starks shot
However, Astros fans almost have to enjoy that World Series in shame amongst themselves because if they bring that title up in mixed baseball company, they will get Well Actually'd if not Motherfucked to death by fans of any other team. Seeing every single fanbase unite against the Astros once #Trashgate was wild. It was like The Avengers uniting against Thanos at the end of Endgame except if the Avengers had blood feuds with each other even close to the ones Yankees and Red Sox fans ignored to take shots at the Astros. I personally wouldn't give a shit how many asterisks people tried to throw at my team winning a title. But what's the point of having your favorite team win a title if you can't talk shit to your friends about something a bunch of total strangers did?
Then again, considering all of this shit has gone down since the Astros championship and baseball writers love talking about curses, I think it's pretty clear to say the 2017 Astros cursed the city of Houston considering the Astros uncertain future is now in Dusty Baker's hands, the Rockets lost one of the best GMs in the NBA while being stuck with an owner who seems to be hated after giving a bunch of draft picks for one year of Russell Westbrook's corpse, and alllllll the shit the Texans have done the last few years before a Pastor completed his coup d'etat of the franchise.
Oh yeah and they may be trading their superstar franchise QB soon. Brutal (Imagine this guy is wearing a Texans shirt).