If You See Someone Wearing These Hats, You Have My Permission To Punch Them In The Face

Saw this picture floating around yesterday and it made me want to vomit:

I was scrolling through twitter while I was taking a dump a few mins ago to make sure I didn't say anything stupid or incriminating on it last night. Tale as old as time. That's when I was reminded of these abominations and something told me, "these have to be fake". I mean, it's not like I did any research on them to see if they were real. I never do research and rarely ever will. Takes too much time when I can just click send or publish in an instant and hope for the best.

But I couldn't stand not knowing if these were real or fake, and guess what? They're very real, and like I said, if you see someone wearing them you have my permission to punch them in the face. That, are get a FOIA warrant to check their hard drives because they're clearly a terrorist. I think that's how FOIA works, not sure, I won't take the time to do any research on it. 

I know what you're probably thinking here: "WSD, nobody would buy those so you don't have anything to worry about you fucking idiot!" and I'm here to tell you that you're wrong.

You can find the hats at this link, and guess what? THEY'RE FUCKING SOLD OUT:

So I will say it again: we have terrorists or some other militarized hate group running around in these hats right now and they must be stopped. There is nothing worse on this planet than the "Chicago" fan. We have two teams, pick one and root for them then hate the other. It's as simple as that.