This new MTV special cleverly titled White People will get CRUCIFIED by the Internet at various points today and when the special airs on July 22nd but asking what it means to be white in America is a good question and obviously one that comes up a lot at Barstool. Our country in particular is changing at a relatively insane pace thanks to the Internet and the culture of outrage that leaks into just about everything. So on merit the documentary is an interesting idea, particularly coming from a Pulitzer-winning journalist like Jose Antonio Vargas. But the problem, which the trailer addresses, is that whenever white people articulate any thoughts that touch on race or culture, it gets perceived one of two ways: 1) They’re a racist or 2) They’re institutionally racist and just aren’t aware they’re racist. It’d be nice for all involved parties if there could be an honest racial dialogue about what it means in this country for everyone involved but with everyone on all sides being insanely reactionary, but that’s just what it is here in today’s climate. Hopefully the documentary is allowed to capture that fairly without too much white-blaming agenda because otherwise, what’s the point?
Anyway I appreciate that a lot of people come to Barstool solely for my opinions on race so just for you guys, here’s what it actually means to be white in America right now: Have you ever tried to solve a Rubik’s Cube? I’m not great with them but once or twice I’ve tried and done a fairly competent job where I’m able to get a side all yellow but the other five sides are still completely screwed up. So you try to move squares around, get your other colors strong, then go back and straighten out the yellows to keep them on point, too. But if you weaken the yellow side too much, you’re fucking the whole thing up and losing the first good thing you had going on the cube. So while most of the yellow squares would probably be happy staying pristine without a care in the world, to solve the puzzle people want to start screwing with it and hope it all works out so that every side of the cube lines up perfectly. The question is: When we get to end of the puzzle do we have green, yellow, red, orange, blue and white all equally strong and evenly balanced? Or did we just cripple yellow for the sake of a Rubik’s utopia without a real idea of how the puzzle works? That’s what being white in America is. That and being really into mayonnaise, those two things.