Meat Sweats With Jordie: The State Of Wisconsin Is Urging It's People To Stop Eating Raw Beef Sandwiches
Okay so before anybody out there starts to think that this is some parody Wisconsin Department of Health Services account or anything, here's a video of a Wisconsin native whipping up a world renowned raw beef sando.
Well shit. If I had known that you maniacs are out there just slapping some ground beef onto a slice of untoasted rye bread, I wouldn't be wasting 14 hours of my life smoking a brisket. Just put that shit through the grinder and bon appetit. Texas has brisket. The Carolinas have whole hog. Memphis has ribs. And apparently Wisconsin has raw meat. Who am I to say that any regional barbecue is better or worse than the others?
Now here's what I'll say. Because yes, this is incredibly repulsive shit here. I can't even begin to imagine what the bathrooms in Wisconsin look like around the holidays when the whole family is scarfing down some raw beef sandos complimented with a fine can of Blatz Beer. But as long as you do it the right way...I mean...it can't be the absolute worst thing in the world to ever eat.
First of all, it would have to be fresh ground beef. We're talking you either grind it up yourself, or you stand there and you watch your butcher grind it up for you. If you're heading to a regular grocery store and picking up a pack of ground beef that has been sitting there for anything longer than a couple of hours, you're fucking sick.
Also, it would have to be coming from a pretty thick cut of meat. The reason you can eat a super rare steak if you want is because all of the potential bacteria on that steak is going to be sitting on the outside of the meat. So you sear the shit out of the outside of the meat in your flaming hot cast iron pan to kill off that bacteria, then the middle of the meat is still good to go. But once you grind that meat, now you have it all mixed together. You have no idea where that potential bacteria could be. So the least you can do is grab a thick cut to give yourself the best chance at getting meat that hasn't had a chance for any bacteria to form yet.
I still think you're all fucked in the head. But if you're going to be a savage, at least do it the right way. And for the love of god, toast the bread or something. Just give yourself a little contrast in texture there so you're not just biting into a pile of mush. I know this is a meal from the days of the Depression, but that doesn't mean you have to still eat like we're in the middle of it.
P.S. - For legal purposes, the Official Jordie's Guide To Food Safety is to never eat uncooked ground beef.