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Assault.

For those wondering if a full Thanksgiving dinner with all the trimmings would quench Adam Schefter's insatiable bloodlust against reporters questioning his #scoops, there's your answer. Schefty just gutted Florio leaving nothing but turkey, side dishes, gravy, and sources on the floor. 

UPDATE: The Florio Strikes Back!

What is that? Assault? Manslaughter? Aggravated Battery? I'll have to ask Mike Portnoy ESQ.

We already missed out on getting the Bad Blood Bowl between the Ravens and Steelers tonight, which may not even be played on Sunday with a decimated Ravens roster, if at all. And I imagine tomorrow's Black Friday fight videos are going to be pretttttttty light since you have to be next level cheap to be willing to risk life, limb, and a pandemic in a fight for a $300 HDTV. So it looks like a source off catfight between two NFL Insiders is going to have to give Americans the violence they crave after the tryptophan wears off. Best of luck to both contestants involved.

Meanshile, somewhere on the internet the baddest motherfucker of all is just waiting to drop his news bomb while these two superpowers are locked in a zero sum game with each other:

Giphy Images.