BAM! CALL AN AMBULANCE! And grab a mop because that’s a whole lot of blood on the field. Wait, what the fuck did we just watch? Soccer is weird. The guy in the red taps the other guy in the face, tries to finger the guys butthole, flops and the other guy gets in trouble. Incredible. Anybody who complains about the NBA flops could watch soccer for 10 minutes and come out the other side thinking basketball players are as tough as hockey players. What’s with that guy fingering the other dude’s butthole? Is that his move? It was almost like he didn’t think the game was televised or being watched by thousands upon thousands of people. Nah, nobody’s gonna see me give him a quick tune up then WHAT DID I DO?